date: 12/12/2022 11:40PM

mood: aging...

birth!! :3c

todays my birthday!! wow...i feel so old!! just kidding i feel exactly the same. if anything, i only really started feeling 13 or so...

what do people do on their birthdays??? i feel like i have to do sometihng special but at the same time i want it to be lowkey. nobody at school even knew it was my birthday so no attention :(( i had my birthday party on the 9th but that also felt kinda unspecial too man :((( i dont wanna be ungrateful but i feel like society sets you up to have such high expectations of what a good birthday is that you cant help but be let down. (i think theres some phil-osophies quote applicable here...) but still!! i had fun :3c i went to a local chinese place for dinner and had some excellent orange chicken (my mom didnt like their hot and sour soup tho...) and my new violin arrived!!! now i have a full size one which will hopefully be easier to play on...

speaking of violin :3c im gonna be starting bach's concerto in a minor!! whoop whoop

in terms of gifts the haul has been pretty mom got me a really nice pink hoodie, my friends have been wonderful and my brother gave me $5 ^_^ (never change...never change) but material goods dont matter!! its all about the birthday spirit. another year successfully lived!!! lets go!!

but idk?? it didnt really feel like /my birthday/ it felt like just a normal school day (even a below-average one...i was sick and coughing hacking the whole time ugh :/) i guess what i really need for my birthday is attention!! i love attention man :3c only i never get any :((

on mondays i have swim so i went swimming and a. completely failed at the dolphin kick (i still dont get it...) b. moved up a level!! look my me master swimmer and c. my thights are absolutely exhausted woough

im really debating whether or not to call in sick tmr because i just feel So Out of it but ik ill a. never get any work done and b. im really looking forward to speech :(( ill probably end up going anyway but goodnight guys!! love yall xx